Urgent requirement for the profile of a Life partner/Soul mate…

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Positions vacant: 1 of course…

Designation:  The Man.

Reporting to: My Best Friend

Age criteria: between 24 yrs to 30 years.

Experience: Not Applicable

Compensation: Treasure worth a lifetime

Key responsibilities:

1. Should have the patience to handle crappy moods.

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2. Must be able to get balloons roses and chocolates as and when needed.

3. Should know when to give hugs and kisses.

4. Should give her the space as and when required.

5. Make her believe in herself everyday.

6. Give her the chance to behave like a mother at times. She needs to boss around.

7. Also cope up with her need to be OCD at certain times.

8. Take her to new places whenever required.

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9. Dance with her. Should know how to dance.

10. Ability to know how to console her when she is crying.

11. Ask for her help whenever you need help. Make her realise that you need her as much she needs you.

12. Compliment her butt. She is extremely proud of it. It is awesome.

13. Brave enough to handle her rage. (Tip: her anger is just a cover up of her hurt… so mostly it would be because there is something hurting her. Start talking… Make her spit it out.)

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14. Should be able to handle competition. There are lots of men in her life. Her father and her brother. Then there are other brothers and friends. Should be able to strike a good relationship with these other men.

15. Should be able to establish trust. She has the unending ability to blindly trust although behaves like a jerk at times. So the candidate should at all times maintain the trust.

15. Likes to pray. Visits churches, temples and mosques and other places of worship. The candidate is expected to accompany even if an atheist.

16. Make sure that she doesn’t cry a lot. Excessive crying causes her sinus attacks.

17. Hold her hands when she is shivering. She has involuntary tremors. tends to get cold.

18. Has insane crush on a certain bollywood actor. Bear with it.

19. Has this urge to decorate her own house. She will convert your house into a warm home sweet home. Don’t chain her thoughts.

20. When drunk tends to get over emotional. Hurts herself by falling even on flat surfaces. Acts like a child so needs to be looked after.

About the Best Friend:

My best friend is one of the most special person I have come across in my life. I have seen her transform from the girl to the woman that she is today. She lacks certain things but there are her other attributes that make up for those lacking points in loads and buckets. There will be times when you will feel belittled in her company but don’t get affected by it. She will make it upto you. Allow her. Give her the chance and you will be amazed by her romantic side.

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Sometimes she needs a nice shaking up. Also a healthy dose of reality. Tends to be obtuse as well. So make sure you give her a good earful of reality and day to day happenings.

Most importantly understand her. She is a very simple person with very basic needs. It doesn’t matter to her whether you have a latest car or bike. She is not a materialistic person. As long as you are with her that is what matters. So make sure you are giving your 100% coz she will give her 250 percent to you.

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Perks: We are looking for The man and not any man. Please understand just because you were born a male doesn’t makes you a man.

1. She will always stand by you. No matter what. So The Man should never give up on her coz she will always hold onto you.

2. She will make you feel the most lucky person in the world. So The Man should also treat her like one.

3. Everything that belongs to her will also belong to you. Completely. No conditions attached.

4. Unconditional love and support. The Man should acknowledge this as in today’s time these are the most important things.

5. She will make your life beautiful. The Man should never chain her thoughts or her creative side. She is into arts and arty stuff.

6. Is very faithful and loyal. As mentioned above my best friend will never give up on you. In today’s world where faith and loyalty are diminishing this person tends to put all of her faith in you. Will be immensely loyal. Fight for you as well. The Man is expected to do the same.

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Statutory warning:

My best friends best friend is a crazy person to the point of obsession. She will hunt You down and kill you if you even remotely activate her best friends tear ducts.

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To apply please drop a message in the inbox.

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~Hydrogen

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